Chapter 1

[Mimi]

Never before had Marlena been so scared in her life. All these emotions came rushing back to her. On some level she knew that she shouldn’t be afraid of John Black, but she was. Alex kept on telling her that John was her husband. She knew that she was a psychiatrist and from what people had told her in the hospital, she was a damn good one. Was it irrational to fear that which she did not know? As hard as she tried, she could not push down the intense feeling she always seemed to feel when she heard his voice. “Marlena” Alex said as he placed his hands on her shoulders, “Are you remembering something?” He asked as gently started to work her shoulders with his fingers. “Uh, no.” Marlena stammered as she pulled away from his grasp, “What is it? I can tell that something is bothering you. Remember, I’m the one that you can trust. You can tell me anything.” “It’s really nothing.” Marlena said quietly as she looked down. “I’m just very tired. I think I’ll lay down for a while.” She said as she got up from her chair and headed toward the stairs. As soon as she entered the guest room, she quickly locked the door and took her cell phone out of the front pocket of her suitcase. “What am I doing?”, she asked herself out loud as she looked for the card that John Black had given her with his contact information the day he left to return to Salem. She had an irrational need to hear his voice and she didn’t know why. She had told Dr. North that she had no desire to see her husband but knew deep down that it was not exactly true. She was afraid. Afraid to be near him. Afraid of the way her stomach felt when he looked at her with longing. How could someone she didn’t know make her feel this way? She looked everywhere but could not find the card. She flipped open the cell phone and decided to see who was in her address book? Kate Brady. Nope, she did not feel good vibes from the hospital. Roman Brady? Nope, she surmised that he was part of the problem with her memory. Bo Brady. Didn’t remember him. Shawn D. Brady? Didn’t remember him. Caroline Brady. No recollection. “What is up with all these Brady’s?” she thought to herself as she thumbed through more Brady names. Eric. Sami, Carrie, Hope. Kimberly, Shawn. The list seemed to go on. “Finally.” she thought to herself as she encountered a series of people with the last name of Horton. None of the names seemed to ring a bell to her. Black. She was curious as to the number of people with the last name of Black. To her surprise she only found two entries. One for her daughter Belle and the other for someone named Brady. She had an uneasy feeling in her stomach as to why her husband was not listed. She continued to go through the entries, surmising that she must have had a lot of friends. As she neared the end of the entries she came across an entry for “Sailor”. “That’s an unusual name,” she thought to herself. Something inside her told her to call the number. “What the hell am I going to say if someone answers? Hi. I’m Marlena Black. How do you know me?” She decided to take the chance and call the number. The phone rang twice before a deep voice on the other end answered it, “John Black.” Marlena, hands shaking, quickly disconnected the call. “What the hell am I going to do? He’s going to know that it is me. What is he going to think? That was real dumb Marlena. You should have just taken the time and spoken to him” She said as she laid down on the bed and put the pillow over her head and screamed. She picked up the phone again and found “Sailor” in the directory and dialed the number. The phone rang once before the same deep voice answered, this time in a hurry, “Marlena. I’m glad you called. Please don’t hang up.” Marlena stared at the phone, forgetting that with cell phone technology he knew it was her before he answered. “Marlena, are you okay?” He asked gently, not wanting to push her and cause her to hang up the phone. After a month of minimal contact he was elated that she had made contact. “I’m okay.” She said softly as tears came to her eyes. “You don’t sound alright to me? Did something happen.” He asked softly. Internally he was fuming. If that asshole Dr. North hurt her in anyway he was going to kill the man with his bare hands and then he would dump his carcas out of the helicopter and let the bears eat him. He’d show Dr. North the wilderness alright. “I’m fine.” She said nothing more. Not willing to give him any clues as to what she was feeling. He made her so uncomfortable, yet there was something about him that drew her to him. Something unexplainable. “How is the weather up there? I bet its getting cold in the evenings?” He asked, wanting to keep her on the phone by discussing “safe” topics. After John had dropped Marlena and Alex off at the cabin he began to see a therapist to deal with his own issues. He felt enormously betrayed that his wife, who was the most loyal person that he knew, would commit adultery. He had such feelings of rage in him towards her and Roman. He kept trying to rationalize her behavior and at one time had himself convinced that Roman probably forced himself on her. The more time John spent with his therapist, the more that he knew that Roman and Marlena both willingly committed adultery. He could be bitter and suspicious and resentful of them for the rest of their lives and eventually drive her away by being an asshole, or he could forgive her for her actions and move on. He decided a couple of weeks ago after a particularly intense session with his therapist, to forgive her in his heart. It was such a liberating moment for him. Yes, the thought of another man fucking his wife sent him over the edge and filled him with rage, but he refused to allow himself to be controlled by that one event. Having Marlena back in his life, healthy and whole was what was most important to him. Thinking back to the time he arrived in Salem, not knowing who he was, gave him insight into what she must be feeling. He realized on some level that he had been a cold-hearted asshole to her since the moment she woke up not knowing who she was. He was more concerned about marking his territory to Roman than actually helping her. “It’s beautiful. The leaves are starting to turn yellow now.” She replied, pulling him out of his thoughts. “Is it getting cold?” He asked, keeping to neutral topics. He knew from personal experience that the last thing that she needed was for him to pressure her into remembering her past. He would only end up alienating her. As long as he kept the conversation “safe” to her, the chance of her calling to talk at a later time was better. “A little. But I don’t mind it at all. There is something about the cold that is so cleansing to me. For the last couple of mornings there has been frost on the ground.” “That sounds beautiful. I wish that I had left you with a camera so that you could have taken pictures of the scenery.” John said before he realized that he may be delving into an area that made her uncomfortable. “That would have been nice. Maybe you could send me a camera. Do I even have a camera?” she asked shyly. “I believe your camera is somewhere around the house. I’ll have the maid look for it.” “You have a maid?” Marlena asked in awe. “Yes.” John said, not elaborating anymore. “Oh course, why wouldn’t you? You have your own helicopter and airplane. Why wouldn’t you have a maid?” She stated sarcastically. “We. Marlena. We. It’s not just mine, they are yours too.” He knew that talk of their life together might shut her down, but he didn’t want to leave her with the impression that these were only his things. They were both of theirs. “Okay. Ours. John can I ask you something personal?” She said whispering into the phone. “Sure. What would you like to know?” His curiosity was peaked as to what she wanted to know. “Is this my cell phone that I have?” “Yes” he answered, not sure of where she was going with this line of questioning. “Do I call you Sailor?” she asked sheepishly? He smiled as he responded, “Yes, as I call you Doc.” “Um, why?” she asked timidly. Before he had a chance to respond he heard banging in the background of the phone. “Marlena. Marlena. Are you okay? Can you hear me?” He said hurriedly into the phone. “It’s Alex, he’s probably worried about me. I’ve got to go now.” She whispered into the phone. “Bye” was the last thing her heard before the line was cut.

John leaned back into his leather chair at Basic Black and put his feet up on the desk. “Well I’ll be damned” he said aloud smiling. “Someone is in a good mood. Care to share with me what is causing such a big smile on your face? I haven’t seen you this happy in a long time John” Kate Brady said as she sat on the corner of his desk taking in his ruggedly handsome looks and beautiful smile.

“The universe is going according to plan, for once.” John said cryptically as he continued to smile. “John, Roman has asked me for a divorce.” Kate said as she started to cry. “I’m sorry Kate.” John said matter of fact, not moving from his spot and not letting the smile on his face diminish by her news. He felt bad for her, he really did, but nothing was going to ruin his elation of Marlena having called him. She wouldn’t have called him if somewhere in subconscience she didn’t care. He had something to grasp onto, hope that things were going to turn around for both of them real soon. “…and so Roman told me that because of what I did to Sami, that our marriage was not salvageable.” Kate said as the tears ran down her face. John handed her a tissue, and mentally composed his response first. “Kate, I know that there has been no love loss between you and Sami. Everyone knows that. You both are quite open about your hate and distrust of each other. But, Sami is his daughter and my stepdaughter. I’m not her biggest fan either. Hell, I openly blame her for pushing Marlena to the emotional limit in the hospital and contributing to her amnesia. But, I would never go after her and intentionally cause her emotional pain. What you did was wrong. You hurt Roman deeply. Can you blame the man for wanting a divorce?” John said as he sat up in his chair and ran his fingers through his hair, avoiding eye contact with Kate. “I can’t believe you of all people are defending that bitch.” Kate said as she pursed her lips, with anger in her voice and eyes. “I’m not defending anyone Kate, I’m just trying to point out to you why Roman asked for a divorce.” “I thought you of all people would be on my side in this. Look at everything that Sami has done to you over the years. Don’t you hate her.” Kate said as she inched closer to where John was sitting. “Regardless of what she has done, she’s Marlena’s daughter. I raised her as my own. No matter what she does, I will always love her and be there for her when she needs me. Just because I may not agree with her actions, doesn’t mean that I am going to dismiss her from my life as if she means nothing to me.” John was trying his hardest not to raise his voice, but Kate was making it hard for him. He was so far beyond caring that Roman had asked her for a divorce.

“What the hell happened to the John Black that I know and love. I can’t believe that you are defending Roman and Sami…” John cut Kate off before she said something that she would really regret later, if that was possible. “That man opened his eyes one day and saw all that he was missing. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a meeting to attend.” John said as he walked past Kate and headed his door, his smile returning to his face. She called me. She called me.