Chapter 9

[Mimi]

“I know I shouldn’t be kissing you. I’m sorry,” Marlena said as she pulled away from John. “We promised each other that we wouldn’t do this.” “It’s okay, Marlena,” John said as he brushed her chin gingerly with his fingers. He bent down and brushed his lips against hers. “Oh God, “ she moaned, opening her mouth and allowing him access. He ran his tongue gently along her lower lip. Eager for the feeling of his tongue, she opened her mouth further, pressing her mouth to his. Their tongues dueled for control. John grabbed the back of Marlena’s head with his left hand and pulled her body even closer to his. She reached down to what little space there was between their bodies, pulled his shirt out of his pants, and ran her fingers along his bare chest. She flicked the tip of his nipple with her nail. His body shivered in response. “Oh Doc,” John moaned as he started kissing Marlena’s bare neck. He couldn’t get enough of her. He slowly lowered the front of her hospital gown, kissing her shoulders and collarbone along the way. Marlena suddenly took his face between her hands and pulled him up to her. John groaned, grabbed her face and passionately began to kiss her once again. “John, we have to stop this,” she said as she continued to kiss him. “This is right Doc. We are right,” he moaned. “No, I’m married and you’re involved,” she reminded him between a kiss. He grabbed her face again and pulled her back to him. “We belong together and that’s a fact.” He kissed her passionately again. “We can’t keep doing this. It’s only going to make it harder when….” He plunged his tongue in her mouth to prevent him from finishing her sentence. “John, I can’t think when you are doing this.” She made no effort to stop him. “That’s the point.” He continued kissing her. “You think too much. Go with your feelings.” He cupped her breasts with his hands and ran this thumbs over her nipples. “My feelings are what got me into this mess.” She admitted as she tried to escape his grasp on her. “ There’s nothing wrong with that.” He pulled her back to him. “John, really we have to stop.” “Says who?” he asked as he bent his head down and pulled her nipple into his mouth. “Says your doctor,” Dr. Carter said as he walked into the room. John jumped off of Marlena leaving her bare. With his back to Dr. Carter, he adjusted himself in his pants. Dr. Carter observed Marlena turning bright red and she quickly pulled up her gown to cover herself. He almost felt guilty for interrupting a tender moment between two lovers. “What can we do for you,” John said turning around. “The tests we ran on Marlena came back fine. The nurse should be by soon with the discharge instructions.” Dr. Carter looked at Marlena but she wouldn’t make eye contact with him. “Does she have any travel restrictions?” John asked. “No, I suggest you contact her primary care physician and arrange for a follow-up appointment sometime next week. Other than that, she looks great.” John breathed a sigh of relief. He reached down and held Marlena’s hand in his. “Do you hear that Doc, you’re going to be fine.” The issue of where she was going to go once she was discharged was the unspoken 2000-pound elephant in the room. Dr. Carter left the room to get the nurse. “I guess I should call Roman and let him know,” she said sadly. “Why don’t I call him?” John suggested. He didn’t want his wife anywhere near her ex-husband who she thought was her current husband. How the hell did they end up in the complicated mess? Marlena looked up at him with skepticism, “My lover calling my husband?” She said with a snark. Screw therapy, John was burning up inside with the thought that the love of his life, the woman he’d die for, thought that she was married to her louse of an ex-husband. Roman. Would there ever be a day that he wasn’t involved in their lives in some way? “Marlena,” John began, trying to chose his words carefully. “I love you more than anything in the world. You are my soulmate. You know that, don’t know?” He somehow needed reassurance from her that in her 1993 world she still loved him. “Oh John,” she said with tears in her eyes. “ You know that I love you. I never stopped loving you. But we can’t continue this way. I can’t continue this. I took vows to be faithful to my husband. I am trying my hardest to be faithful to my vows. Can’t you see that this is killing me? I want to be with you more than anything in the world, you have to know that.” “Then why can’t you?” he asked her. 1993 or 2005, the answer was still relevant to him. “Dammit John. I stood before God and my friends proclaiming my fidelity to Roman. I can’t turn my back on that no matter what my feelings are for you.” Why couldn’t he understand? “Are you afraid of disappointing people? Is that it Marlena? I could understand your commitment to Roman if you loved him, but I have yet to hear you associate that word and his name in the same sentence.” John was pissed. He seemed to be having the same argument with her that he had in 1993. “Don’t try to psychoanalyze me John.” She warned him. “Look I’m sorry. Why don’t I take you to a motel and tomorrow we’ll figure out what to do.” All he needed was a night alone with her and he was sure that he could make her remember who she was and their life together. “No.” “No?” He asked. “No, it’s not a good idea with the state our emotions are in right now. I want to go with Dr. North.” Marlena said calmly. “Dr. North?” John asked in astonishment. What the fuck? He forgot about her knowing who Alex was. “Why would you go with him? You hardly know him.” “Hardly know him? John, Alex is an old friend of mine. I didn’t realize that he was working in this hospital. It will be good to spend some time catching up with him.”