Post by Tammy on Aug 17, 2006 13:09:11 GMT -5
John walked down the pier with his head hung low and the tears flowing freely from his eyes. He continued to chastise himself for making love to Marlena when he knew he wouldn’t be there in the morning. “How could I do that to Doc” he said to himself repeatedly. He was starring out over the water when he heard footsteps approaching, but he paid no attention to who those steps belonged to. Then suddenly he was jolted when he felt a tender hand touch his shoulder. “John?” John spun around and starred at her loving face with tears in his eyes as he spoke to her, “Hey, Sami.” She noticed the tears in his eyes and engulfed him in a hug. “John…you can still change your mind. You don’t have to do this.” He shook his head and pulled away from her. “Yes Sami…I have to do this. I have no choice.” She lead him over to the bench and they sat down. “John didn’t you and mom always drill it in my head that there is ALWAYS another choice?” John sat there starring out over the water while he spoke to his daughter, “Oh…peanut! I am afraid there is no other choice this time. It is just something that I have to do. I hope you understand.” Sami nodded, “Actually I do understand why you feel the need to handle the situation this way. I just don’t think… I don’t think mom will understand it though.” John sighed deeply and hung his head. “Oh man… I am afraid that what happened tonight…will make it even harder for her.” Sami walked up to stand beside him on the waters edge, “What happened tonight?” John just looked at her with a sad smile. Sami took a deep breath, “Uh oh… did you see mom tonight?” John nodded his head, “Yeah… you could say that.” John hesitated slightly, “Well remember when I ran into you all at Salem Place this afternoon? Well I was rather cold and distant with Doc and she asked me what was wrong, and I made up some excuse about being sick. Well long story short… she came over to check on me, and she brought me dinner.” Sami nodded, “Well that doesn’t sound to bad. At least you got to see her…right?” John let out a snort, “Ummm yeah… I got to see her.” Sami looked at John and read the expression on his face quite clearly. “Oh nooo… don’t tell me…” John turned around to face her, “Sami listen…” Sami put her hands up in protest, “No I mean it John… don’t tell me anymore…seriously I don’t want any details. I get the picture.” John ran his fingers through his hair and let out a grunt. “Argggh…I just made a bad situation ten times worse.” Sami walked over to the bench and sat down. She laid her head in the palm of her hands. “John… I would like to reassure you… but I am afraid that would be a hollow gesture. Mom is going to be devastated when she wakes up to find you gone.” John paces back and forth, “I am well aware of that Sami. I did… leave her a note.” Sami let out a rye chuckle, “Huh… I am afraid that unless you told her in that ‘note’ exactly where you are going and what you are doing… she will find it of little comfort.” Sami began to get frustrated with the situation. “I can’t believe that I got myself involved in this. John… how am I supposed to do this, huh? How am I supposed to see mom in pain and not do anything about it?” John sat down beside her and gently rubbed her back. “I know peanut…I am sorry I got you stuck in the middle of this. It’s just that… I really need your help.” Sami began to cry softly, “I know that…and I am happy that you trust me enough to help you. It’s just that by helping you…I am hurting mom.” John sighed. “I know and I’m sorry. Listen I understand that this is an awful position to put you in. So… if you feel the need to… you can tell you mother…what I am going to do…although I really whish you wouldn’t. But I am begging of you don’t tell her WHERE I am. I don’t want her to come looking for me. Okay… can you promise me that much?” Sami wiped her tears from her eyes. She took a deep breath and looked at John. She saw a deep sense of pleading and vulnerability that she had never seen before. “Okay…I promise not to tell mom WHERE you are. The rest… I will play by ear. Deal?” John nodded, “Deal peanut.” He hugged her tightly and kissed her on the cheek. Suddenly they both jumped at the sound of someone approaching them. “John? John it me Roman.” John turned around and looked at him, “Hey Roman…I am just curious are you capable of telling time? You were supposed to be here at midnight…which was thirty minutes ago.” Roman approached them, “You know what John I…” Suddenly he stopped speaking when he saw Sami sitting beside John. “Sami! What…what the hell are you doing here?” Sami just smirked at him and looked over at John. “She is helping me Roman.” Roman’s face turned beat red. “John what the hell are you thinking? How could you get her involved in this… it could be dangerous.” John held is hand up to cut off Romans ranting. “Relax Roman…I would never put her in harms way. She is only helping me with the FIRST part of the plan… the second part she will have nothing to do with.” Roman just stared at him. “John… I don’t understand why you got her involved at all.” John just huffed at him, “Because… you insensitive ass… I would like to have SOMEONE by my side when I do this. And since it can’t be Marlena… well Sami is the next best thing.” John turned to Sami and put his arm around her. Sami hugged him in return, “Besides dad… John needed someone to look after mom… Belle has enough to worry about with Philip being held hostage. And since Eric, Carrie and… Brady aren’t here…John had no one else to turn to.” Roman just starred at them, “This just make NO sense what so ever. You two can’t even hold a civil conversation most of the time. And all of a sudden you are best buddies?” John just grunted in frustration. “Listen Roman… we don’t have time to argue about this right now. Thanks to you I am way behind schedule. We have to get going, Sami can fill you in later with all the details okay. I have to get a move on so…lets get going. Why don’t you take the stuff to the car and I’ll be there in a minute. I need to talk to Sami.” Roman just huffed as he picked up John’s bag and walked away. John turned to face Sami. He grabbed her shoulders and looked into her eyes. She started to cry and John wiped away her tears as best he could. “Hey hey now peanut…don’t cry. Everything will be okay I promise.” Sami gave John a smile to reassure him and he smiled back. “Now… you remember…I left you in charge of my personal affairs. If something comes up you deal with it as you see fit. I have total faith in you peanut.” Sami started to cry and launched herself into his arms. “Thank you for…believing in me. I will take care of everything… including mom. You have my word.” John smiled and squeezed her tight. “Thank you sweetheart. I feel a lot better knowing that. Just please… make sure you check on your mom first thing tomorrow. She is going to need you.” John pulled away from her and kissed her on the cheek. John stared to walk away when he turned around once more. “I love you…Sami! I will see you soon?” Sami nodded her head and wiped her tears, “That’s a fact!” John smile at the familiar phrase and turned to leave. “John?” John turned once more to face his daughter. “John I… love you too.” That made John smile. He blew her and kiss and then he was gone. Sami sat down on the bench and got a grip on her endless tears. “Oh mom… everything will be okay… I promise.” Sami headed home to get some rest… tomorrow morning was approaching quickly and she is going to need all the sleep she can get.
Marlena laid in bed clinging to John’s pillow. She hid her face deeper in the covers as the morning sun invaded the room. When the sun wouldn’t relent Marlena began to stir from her peaceful sleep. As the memories from last night began to invade her conscience mind she smiled broadly. She stretched her arm out over John’s side of the bed hoping to cuddle up next to him, but to her dismay John’s side of the bed was empty. She sat up slowly and surveyed the room, but John was no where in site. She got out of bed and went to the bathroom, but yet again… she saw no sign of her husband. Marlena began to feel panicked. It wasn’t like John not to be beside her when she woke up. Marlena checked the whole penthouse but to no avail…there was no sign of him. She paced the bedroom thinking of where John might be. As she paced something on the dresser caught her eye. She walked over and noticed an envelope that read “To The Love Of My Life”. She smiled to herself, “I knew he wouldn’t leave me here to worry about him without so much as a word.” She took the envelop and crawled back into bed. She opened the letter and before she read it she held it up to her face and inhaled the sent of the paper. Whenever John left her a note he always sprayed it with his cologne because he knew how much Marlena loved his sent. Marlena settled against the headboard and began to read with a smile on her face.
My Dearest Love, I am sorry that I left without so much as a goodbye but… it is better this way. Actually in all honesty I couldn’t face you. I didn’t want to see the pain in your eyes when I told you that…I was leaving.
Marlena’s breath caught in her through and the smile faded quickly from her face. “Leaving…what… I don’t understand.” She mumbled as she continued to read his letter.
I know you are confused right now baby… and I am so sorry to hurt you like this. There are just some…issues… in my life that I have to take care of. I have to deal with these issues before… they tear us apart. I know that you would have helped me deal with them but… this is something that I had to do… on my own. I know what you must be thinking. I am sure the first thing that popped into that beautiful head of your was Kate. But dear god…honey if you believe nothing else that I am telling you…please believe me when I say that Kate… has nothing to do with why I left. I love you… only you…always YOU!
Marlena was sobbing. There was no way she could control the torrent of tears that were falling from her eyes. She swatted at her tears angrily as she kept reading.
Oh Doc… there is so much I want to say to you. Everyone wants to find a love, someone who will always care. I am so blessed to have found that… in you. I swear sometimes it feels as though you know me by heart. I find it amazing that you love me the way you do, especially after all of the pain I have caused you over the years. Oh honey…I just want you to know that… you are my shinning star. You are the one that guides me, you keep me centered and focused. And because of that I know that I can get through anything… but this is just something I have to get through… on my own! I know that you probably hate me now… for hurting you like this. Especially because of what happened between us last night. Believe me you couldn’t possible hate me more than I do. Leaving was the hardest thing I ever had to do… especially after the wonderful love we shared together last night. I won’t say that I regret making love to you…because that would be a lie. I just… regret how much I am hurting you now. I don’t know how long I will be gone for… but I will be back. However… I will understand if you want nothing to do with me…when I return. I just want you to know… that EVERYTHING I am doing is for us. I am doing it to preserve our love… our family… our life together. I love you Doc! ~John
Marlena was sobbing uncontrollable. “How… how could he…leave me. We… were separated for over a year… I just… got him…back. Now he’s… gone again!” Marlena was screaming and crying and sobbing… trying to rid herself of the immense pain she felt. She was jolted from her crying by the sound of keys unlocking the front door. This brought a slight smile to her face. “I knew it… I knew he couldn’t leave me!” Marlena jumped from the bed and ran from the room. She made her way downstairs yelling all the way. “John? John… honey I am so glad that you changed your mind… and came back to me!” Marlena made it down to the bottom step and stopped in her tracks. The smile faded from her face as she noticed that it was Sami… not John who came in the front door. Sami noticed her mother’s knees buckle as she slumped down onto the step. Sami stared at her mother for a moment. Marlena began to cry such heavy sobs she was almost hyperventilating. Sami rushed over to sit at her moms side. Marlena turned and looked at her. Sami took her mother in her arms and held her tightly. “It’s okay mom… I am here” Marlena cried harder, “JOHN!!! I want… John here!!! I want… him to come back…” Sami didn’t know what to say. She just sat and held her mother. She gently rocked her back and forth and waited for her tears to end… although she feared that there was no end in site.
Marlena laid in bed clinging to John’s pillow. She hid her face deeper in the covers as the morning sun invaded the room. When the sun wouldn’t relent Marlena began to stir from her peaceful sleep. As the memories from last night began to invade her conscience mind she smiled broadly. She stretched her arm out over John’s side of the bed hoping to cuddle up next to him, but to her dismay John’s side of the bed was empty. She sat up slowly and surveyed the room, but John was no where in site. She got out of bed and went to the bathroom, but yet again… she saw no sign of her husband. Marlena began to feel panicked. It wasn’t like John not to be beside her when she woke up. Marlena checked the whole penthouse but to no avail…there was no sign of him. She paced the bedroom thinking of where John might be. As she paced something on the dresser caught her eye. She walked over and noticed an envelope that read “To The Love Of My Life”. She smiled to herself, “I knew he wouldn’t leave me here to worry about him without so much as a word.” She took the envelop and crawled back into bed. She opened the letter and before she read it she held it up to her face and inhaled the sent of the paper. Whenever John left her a note he always sprayed it with his cologne because he knew how much Marlena loved his sent. Marlena settled against the headboard and began to read with a smile on her face.
My Dearest Love, I am sorry that I left without so much as a goodbye but… it is better this way. Actually in all honesty I couldn’t face you. I didn’t want to see the pain in your eyes when I told you that…I was leaving.
Marlena’s breath caught in her through and the smile faded quickly from her face. “Leaving…what… I don’t understand.” She mumbled as she continued to read his letter.
I know you are confused right now baby… and I am so sorry to hurt you like this. There are just some…issues… in my life that I have to take care of. I have to deal with these issues before… they tear us apart. I know that you would have helped me deal with them but… this is something that I had to do… on my own. I know what you must be thinking. I am sure the first thing that popped into that beautiful head of your was Kate. But dear god…honey if you believe nothing else that I am telling you…please believe me when I say that Kate… has nothing to do with why I left. I love you… only you…always YOU!
Marlena was sobbing. There was no way she could control the torrent of tears that were falling from her eyes. She swatted at her tears angrily as she kept reading.
Oh Doc… there is so much I want to say to you. Everyone wants to find a love, someone who will always care. I am so blessed to have found that… in you. I swear sometimes it feels as though you know me by heart. I find it amazing that you love me the way you do, especially after all of the pain I have caused you over the years. Oh honey…I just want you to know that… you are my shinning star. You are the one that guides me, you keep me centered and focused. And because of that I know that I can get through anything… but this is just something I have to get through… on my own! I know that you probably hate me now… for hurting you like this. Especially because of what happened between us last night. Believe me you couldn’t possible hate me more than I do. Leaving was the hardest thing I ever had to do… especially after the wonderful love we shared together last night. I won’t say that I regret making love to you…because that would be a lie. I just… regret how much I am hurting you now. I don’t know how long I will be gone for… but I will be back. However… I will understand if you want nothing to do with me…when I return. I just want you to know… that EVERYTHING I am doing is for us. I am doing it to preserve our love… our family… our life together. I love you Doc! ~John
Marlena was sobbing uncontrollable. “How… how could he…leave me. We… were separated for over a year… I just… got him…back. Now he’s… gone again!” Marlena was screaming and crying and sobbing… trying to rid herself of the immense pain she felt. She was jolted from her crying by the sound of keys unlocking the front door. This brought a slight smile to her face. “I knew it… I knew he couldn’t leave me!” Marlena jumped from the bed and ran from the room. She made her way downstairs yelling all the way. “John? John… honey I am so glad that you changed your mind… and came back to me!” Marlena made it down to the bottom step and stopped in her tracks. The smile faded from her face as she noticed that it was Sami… not John who came in the front door. Sami noticed her mother’s knees buckle as she slumped down onto the step. Sami stared at her mother for a moment. Marlena began to cry such heavy sobs she was almost hyperventilating. Sami rushed over to sit at her moms side. Marlena turned and looked at her. Sami took her mother in her arms and held her tightly. “It’s okay mom… I am here” Marlena cried harder, “JOHN!!! I want… John here!!! I want… him to come back…” Sami didn’t know what to say. She just sat and held her mother. She gently rocked her back and forth and waited for her tears to end… although she feared that there was no end in site.
